Dear Puranjana Prabhu
Pamho. Agtsp. Please publish the letter below,
which was sent to the guru
poison committee with the request of publishing it anonymously.
Ys, xxxxx das
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To the guru poison committee
gurupoison@hotmail.com
Subject: With heavy heart...
Please accept my fallen obeisance's at your lotus feet's. I have stayed up all night reading related articles on http://members.tripod.com/gurupoison et cetera, and must tell you what has been on my mind for some time. I have been looking for who or where to give this information.
In Mayapura, 1977, I was very ill. One day, feeling like finally healing, but still ill, I was benedicted with a maha-lassi (yogurt-drink) that came off Prabhupada's plate. I have senses past normal, and sometimes I pick up things, and the impression in my mind is a memory of a mention, a whisper in the hall perhaps, of poison, and a distinct feeling of being like watched to see if there was any effect.
I am sure all involved persons could be found, but do not wish to state this publicly in case this comes to trial and witnesses. I know I dismissed it all as my mind at the time(which I often do with psychic/ telepathic impressions), but the fact is I became progressively very much more ill as the day progressed, and cannot give the count of days, but was soon jetted home early, the TP informing the local devotees I was in mahamaya.
He thought I was playing up or something, but I was so sick I layed on the floor in the back of the jet all the way home, and the stewardesses didn't even try to move me, cuz it was obvious I could barely move myself (It might even be possible to track down the stewardesses!). This was not airsick; I don't get airsick.
Soon after arriving I did mend quickly, further contributing to the 'maya' theory. (I say theory, cuz it was no news I'm in maya, duh...but there was some idea that my sickness wasn't sickness but maya, and that is not the case.) I cannot number days, due to illness and being unable to know, but later the day I received the maha-lassi, or the next morning, Srila Prabhupada was rushed out of Mayapura to Vrndavana, extremely ill. This is historically provable, so the date can easily be ascertained, and thus devotees who knew I was given the lassi-drink, and perhaps were suspicious, there are possible witnesses. Perhaps it is not usable, but if it is, there you are; I've told you my story.
Yours in service to His Loving Memory,
xxxx-devi dasi
(not the xxxx everyone knows, just a little sister)
ps. How is it that I am in such shock, yet the tears are not flowing?
How hard my heart must really be!
pps. I tried to send the petition, but don't know how, if possible I would
appreciate directions, if too much trouble, don't worry, I will find a way.
ppps. All glories to your devoted service to His Divine Grace Srila
Prabhupada!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Reply by Aruna das: I am very sorry to hear about your bad experiences in Mayapur and how you became very sick after drinking the maha-lassi, which probably was poisoned. I believe they might have tested it on you first before they gave it to Prabhupada. It is quite possible...
I had been there in Mayapur at these times also, and I have seen Pishima (Srila Prabhupadas sister) cooking for him. Srila Prabhupada stated to all of us that poison was given to him via his food, so he only wanted to eat what was cooked by his sister. But than he still became very sick and they removed him to Vrindavan where I saw him dying...
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Dear Aruna prabhu,
Please accept the obeisance I have within my power to offer, from this very ungreat
soul! Thank you for all your well-received encouragement and comforting words.
I have no objection of your using my letter (for publishing), but would appreciate
my anonymity, for the sake of the godsisters who brought me the lassi, who are
certainly incapable of having been involved, and only if it came to actual legal
use would I want their names handed over for involvement as possible witnesses
to be questioned.
I wished to make sure you noticed that I had been sick already (thus the reason for the benediction of such rare maha. You may remember that Srila Prabhupada had ordered the women who were sick to be brought to the building where his quarters were at, due to the atrocious condition of the ladies quarters and bathroom. Literally stool everywhere, though I did not have contribute to this myself, chuckle, or I would have simply lain down right by the comode!), but was on the mend, when I received the lassi, and became progressively more ill, when I shouldn't have, as I described before.
Another point is that my impression was more one of Prabhupada having not drunk the lassi, and someone wanting to see if I was affected, not one of the bad guys, perhaps someone who just couldn't believe what they'd heard in the form of a rumour possibly. But I wish to stress that I don't know; it is merely an impression, and your suggested scenario is equally possible. I prefer mine, for that would have meant I received the poison instead of Prabhupada. And anyway in my young somewhat healthy body there was no lasting effect that I know of. It may seem despicable of someone to do that, but it doesn't feel that way to me, rather it feels an honour if I'd received it instead of him. But of course it has been established, at least to my conviction, that what I received was only a drop of what Prabhupada himself was given, and not instead of his receiving it.
As for it being a bad experience, what is sickness compared to receiving the maha of a pure devotee like Prabhupada? Nothing else matters but that I know that I received such mercy from my spiritual master. It was the first and only time I had seen him actually, that first morning after we arrived in Mayapur and he gave class. After class I hung on in the temple room, after he passed by all of us waiting in happy anticipation. In the end, when he passed, I was too shy to look at him, but I felt inside that he recognized me as his disciple, and that is my all in all.
I was very surprised, shortly afterwards, that so many devotees had filtered out and Srila Prabhupada was still there, and with only a handful of dunda-men around him (please forgive my disrespect on this term, that is something I can't help). I held my ground and somehow magically Srila Prabhuapda appeared about two feet directly in front of me! With NO ONE in between! I simply watched, feeling amazed, but too covered over to feel anything really spiritual like ecstacy.
But for a few moments he began to dance, jumping as high as two feet off the ground! This could have been no more than three or four days before he was rushed to Vrndavana. Despite my inability to actually feel any proper ecstasy, I believe that my spiritual master recognized me as his disciple and accepted me to the shelter of his lotus feet. Therefore my hope against hope is always filled with hope, and my short stay in Mayapur is the real highlight of my life. I am not sorry about any of it, and even my getting sick, it was simply the cause of my receiving his maha. Even the likes of me, so that just proves everything.
Thank you for your tireless work, you and all those involved, in uncovering the truth and seeking justice and rectification. When I was 'in' Iskcon, it seemed that there were only 'posers' and 'grumblers', the posers on the magic eleven bandwagon, and the grumblers hanging in the wings, knowing how "out to lunch" their dishonest godbrothers were, but never doing anything but grumble, never even trying to share their knowledge to the benefit of innocent souls who got drawn into the game due to their desire to serve Srila Prabhupada's mission. Know that there are very many of us who are enormously grateful for all of your efforts!
I am at the moment suspended in reading of the poison book or more of your site, all of which I will get back to when I feel some strength return to face the heavy truths. But it is my duty, as far as I'm concerned, to learn as much of the truth as Krsna provides me. I have to take it in measured doses, too much at once and I think I will explode!
So thank you again.
Aspiring for the humility to say,
xxxx-devi dasi
SITES
TO CHECK OUT:
NEW
SITE: http://members.tripod.com/gurupoison
(Tamal indictment)
*
pada's alternative email: angel108b@yahoo.com
* pada's new pager number is 707-973-0372
* press in your number then press pound, and pray that it works.
* Book For Sale "Someone Has Poisoned Me," You can get it from: New
Jaipur Press/ POB 208/ Mayodan NC 27027 $10.00 requested donation
* Seattle, Wa (Dhamaghosa dasa 360-856-5411) dasdasdas@aol.com
* MONTREAL, Canada, Hasti Gopala Dasa (for details write to: hasti90@hotmail.com)
* BERKELEY California. Hare Krishna Youth, 510-389-3346 conducts regular harinam
parties, arotikes, cooking classes, college preaching, Prabhupada video nights,
and so on.
* NEW YORK "Prabhupada Sankirtana Society" Headquarters 48 Ave. B NY,
NY 10009 (212) 674-0680, PSS108@juno.com
01) http://members.tripod.com/gurupoison
(Tamal indictment)
02) http://mitglied.lycos.de/pada/
pada newsletter archive
03) http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Parliament/3933
Poison tape
04) Poison tape transcript:
04) http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Parliament/3933/19990519.htm
05) http://www.winink.com/tkg/
Poison whispers
06)
http://www.islandnet.com/krsna/vada/poison/poison.htm
Poison issue
07)
http://www.egroups.com/group/Vaisnavacouncil
(Visoka cyber istagosthi)
08)
http://www.krsna.tv (underground
Hare Krishna web site)
09) www.prabhupada.cc Prabhupada samkirtana site
10) http://tsa.ppp.ripco.net/padaweb/puranjan.html
Puranjana's Site
11) http://mitglied.lycos.de/gbc
GBC expose
12) http://pages.infinit.net/pragosh/home.html
French site
13) http://members.aol.com/gauridas
Gauridasa's site
14) http://www.islandnet.com/krsna/
Rocana's site
15) www.harekrsna.de
"Hare Krsna Homepage" (German)
16) http://members.nbci.com/prabhupada/
ISKCON Reform (German)
17) German translation of Final Order (pdf)
17) http://members.nbci.com/prabhupada/final.htm
18) http://members.xoom.com/prabhupada/
(German Expose)
19) http://www.equalsouls.org/tkg
Srila Prabhupada wanted to be poisoned?
20) http://www.surrealist.org/gurukula/
Nandini's history site
21) http://www.krishnabooks.org
Guptas KBI Books (he is a cheat)
22) http://mitglied.lycos.de/gbc/
GBC
23) "illicit sex
guru" rationalizations:
23) http://www.islandnet.com/krsna/vada/iskcon/right.htm
24) http://www.artnet.net/~yasoda/index.htm
Appointment tape fraud
25) http://www.asitis.com
Original Bhagavad-gita As It Is
26) http://krsnabook.com
Original Krsna Book
27) http://www.krishna.org
Prabhupada Hare Krishna News Network
28) http://folio.bhaktivedanta.org
S.P. Folio Infobase CD-ROM
29) http://realaudio.bhaktivedanta.org
Prabhupada RealAudio Archive
30) http://mp3.bhaktivedanta.org
Prabhupada MP3 Bhajans, 2 CD set
31) www.domgbc.org
(Direction Of Management)
32) www.acbspn.com/ Prabhupada
Network
33) www.ROOPA.org
(Raghunatha dasa's world economics proposal)
34)
http://www.prabhupada.com/
BBT archives site
35)
http://www.govinda.net (first
editions of S.P. books)
36) http://www.JitendriyaBooks.com
Trading original SP. books
37) http://krsna.kgb.cz/hlavni.htm
Prague Czech-devotees (english site)
38) http://tsa.ppp.ripco.net/das/articles.htm (DAS)
39) http://www.com.org/hb/ptd/cyber_gurukula.htm (Cyber gurukula)